BE

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SOME BANK IS ABOUT TO GO MASSIVELY UNDER FROM THEIR OIL SHORT WHO WILL IT BE???

BE, CRWV, APLD, NBIS, and IREN are going to get slaughtered today Highly volatile stocks that pumped because of ORCL but will plummet if we go big red today

BECAUSE THERE WILL ONE DAY BE A DAY WHERE IT DOESNT RECOVER AND EVERYDAY I FEEL LIKE ITS THAT DAY AND IM WRONG BUT I HAVE TO CONTINUE THIS ENDLESS CYCLE BECAUSE THATS JUST HOW IT IS

HOW CAN THE ENTIRE MARKET BE GREEN AND SILVER IS RED I HATE THAT I EVER DISCOVERED THIS SUB I HATE YOU ALLLLLLLL 😭😭😭

IF BEING A DEGENERATE IS WRONG THEN YOU KNOW WHAT I AINT WANNA BE RIGHT HOW BOUT DAT

BREAKING NEWS: CPI WILL BE DELAYED TO FRIDAY THIS WEEK

GONNA BE BACK AT THE BEACH CONDO SOON. NEXT MONTH OR SO. DAILY REMY BEACH PICS INCOMING

"OH DID I SAY WE WERE RAIN FIRE AND DEATH DOWN ON THEM!? I MEANT TO SAY IM WILLING TO TALK AND BE NICE! PROMISE!" *frantically checks phone*

FUCK. SO ARE WE BASICALLY A PAPER TIGER LIKE RUSSIA. LOOKS LIKE WE'RE GOING TO HAVE THE SAME FATE, TOO DUMB TO REALIZE THAT DRONE WARFARE WAS THE FUTURE WHEN FUCKING UKRAINE FIGHTS THEM EVERYDAY. BRAIN DEAD MILITARY. LOOKS LIKE THE ENTIRE WORLD WILL BE POOR AF VERY SOON. HUMANS ARE THE MOST DESTRUCTIVE SPECIES.

🥭 said BE BRAVE!!!

THE TREASURY WILL BE MARGIN CALLED

BREAKING NEWS: FRANCE HAS DEPLOYED MIMES TO THE STRAITS OF HORMUZ. THIS ELITE BERET FORCE IS KNOWN TO BE SILENT, YET SILLY.

CRACK BE WILD YO

AHOY! THERE BE MINES MATEY! OIL $300

"U.S. INTEL SEES SIGNS IRAN MAY BE PREPARING TO DEPLOY MINES IN STRAIT OF HORMUZ SHIPPING LANE – CBS REPORTER" Important to note here that SPX fell 0.65% on this because it implies a months-long closure of the Strait. The Strait is already mined with what the military calls "active mines" or UUVs, which is why no escorts are possible. Mining it old-fashioned style will take months to undo, and suggests Iran doesn't see its UUV capabilities as sufficient.

THE WHITE HOUSE JUST PROVED THEY ARE LIEING CRIMINAL SACKS OF SHIIT THAT DESERVE TO BE PUT UNDER THE JAIL OIL $300

BULLS BE LIKE "Y LINE GO DOWN **🤪" 😂😂😂 fkn dumb animals**

BREAKING NEWS: CPI REPORT WILL BE DELAYED TO WEDNESDAY NEXT WEEK

THE PREMARKET PUMP COULD HAVE BEEN TO LURE YOU INTO BUYING PUTS BUT SOMEHOW MM ARE DUMPING M. MAYBE AFTER INSIDE GOOD NEWS. I COULD BE WRONG BUT I THINK WE ARE GOING ULTRAGREEN. HEY AT LEAST I PREDICTED THE INVASION 24H BEFOREHAND. 

#THEM TOMAHAWKS MUST BE SOME NEW TEK BC ITS SOUNDS DEADLY FOR IRAN TO HAVE!

To summarize 🥭’s address in one sentence: NOW WOULD BE A GREAT TIME TO BUY -DJT

IF I DONT MAKE IT OUT OF THE OPERATING ROOM FOR MY PROCEDURE WEDNESDAY CAN YOU GUYS PLEASE TAKE CARE OF REMY AS IF HE WAS YOUR OWN. HE LIKES TO BE HAND FED AND HE CANT SLEEP WITHOUT A FAN BECAUSE HE GETS HOT

I DONT WANT TO BE A WSB CELEBRITY ANYMORE I JUST WANNA BE A NOBODY LIKE YOU GUYS. I DONT CARE ABOUT THE FAME AND MONEY ANYMORE THIS HAS BEEN A WSB CELEBRITY UPDATE

PUT YOUR HANDS UP Traditional-Bet2379!!! POLICE ARE ENROUTE! PREPARE TO BE BOOKED FOR PROVIDING ILLEGAL FINANCIAL ADVICE! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/wallstreetbets) if you have any questions or concerns.*

#ITS GOING TO BE ENDED SOON Imagine if your boss spoke like this lmao.

#AND I'M PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN

TOMORROW WILL BE THE GREENEST DAY U EVER SEE DUMM BERS

I move to ban theta from the market. Nay, I doth CALL FOR THETA TO BE BANNED FROM THE MARKET. Cause you know when you "CALL " for things, like in the gubment, they have to do that shit.

#IS THE PRESSER GONNA BE AT THE 4 SEASONS LAWN GARDEN MOTEL LMAOOOO

#FRENCH FINANCE MINISTER SAYS HE HOPES G7 STATEMENT ON TALKS OVER POSSIBLE RELEASE OF EMERGENCY OIL STOCKS WILL BE MADE IN COMING HOUR don’t worry guys your shitty market will go up soon

FRENCH FINANCE MINISTER SAYS HE HOPES G7 STATEMENT ON TALKS OVER POSSIBLE RELEASE OF EMERGENCY OIL STOCKS WILL BE MADE IN COMING HOUR are we js wating on this? or doesn’t matter

MY DATACENTERS BE GREENINGGG

🎩🧐 I DO SAY I BELIEVE THIS MIDDLE EAST OIL SITUATION MIGHT BE A PROBLEM

If you think the job market is bad now, wait until after the apocalypse POSITION: **NEW CALIFORNIA TRIBE GUARD (DIVISION F2, RANK 3)** QUALIFICATIONS: * BACHELOR'S DEGREE OF FIGHTING, PILLAGING, RAIDING, OR LOOTING * 10+ YEARS EXPERIENCE AS A NOMAD * 3+ YEARS EXPERIENCE WORKING WITH SPEARS, GUNS WITH NO BULLETS, OR CARS WITH NO FUEL * 3+ YEARS EXPERIENCE CANNIBALISM * MUST BE WILLING TO RELOCATE * *THIS IS AN INTERNSHIP POSITION WITHOUT PAY. COMPENSATION IS PROVIDED IN THE FORM OF VALUABLE EXPERIENCE WORKING WITH THE NEW WORLD ORDER.* TO APPLY, PLEASE VISIT OUTPOST #1213 (AT THE TOP OF THE GREAT HILL)

# I JUST THOUGHT OF SOMETHING, IF I STOP BUYING STOCKS, I WOULD BE SO HAPPY **WHY THE FCK DID I NOT JUST DO THAT????? 😮‍💨**

# I KNOW A LOT OF US WILL LOSE ALL OF OUR MONEY BUT IT WOULD BE FUNNY IF THE S&P DROPPED TO THE FLAT POINT SINCE HE TOOK OFFICE. **AND HE WILL TWEET IT BECAUSE OF OUR BELOVED BlDEN**

PREPARE FOR TRADING PLATFORMS TO GO OFFLINE TOMORROW. RANDOM UPDATES WILL BE THE EXCUSE.

BULLS BE LIKE ‘I BELIEVE’… MARGE BE LIKE ‘I COLLECT’

DONT BE SOMEONE ELSES EXIT LIQUIDITY

MARKETS CRASH OIL RISING LARGEST TACO TO BE DELIVERED ON A GOLD PLATTER BE READY

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COMEX SAID NAH THE SHORTS WILL BE SAVED LMAO SO RIGGED

“ITS GONA BE GREEN” LMAO

I GOT WTI CALLS I'M GONNA BE RIIIIIIIICH

COULD BE WORSE FOR BOLS. THEY COULD HAVE THEIR PORTFOLIOS HELD HOSTAGE BY BLACKROCK. LOL

# DAYLIGHT SAVING SHOULD BE UNCONSTITUTIONAL

I WILL BE AT THE FOREFRONT🫴⚔️

HIGH GAS PRICES ARE GOOD FOR AFFORDABILITY, THEY WILL BE HELPFUL FOR AN OLD FASHIONED TERM CALLED GROCERIES.

I JUST WANT TO GET RICH ENOUGH TO BE DEBT FREE!!! 🗣️