FUND

The parents should be fund managers.

New baby has been awake since 3am. I'm ready to lose his college fund today. Let's get it.

JUST IN: Blue Owl permanently halts redemptions at private credit fund aimed at retail investors, per FT

Tesla and carvana both use interparty transactions to boost profit… Tesla uses xAI to fund its autopilot software off balance sheet

Blue Owl permanently halts redemptions at private credit fund aimed at retail investors

“Private credit group Blue Owl will permanently restrict investors from withdrawing their cash from its inaugural private retail debt fund, backtracking from an earlier plan to reopen to redemptions this quarter.” Huh

> Blue Owl permanently halts redemptions at fund aimed at retail investors-ft bers about to goon all night

Yolod my 401k into an international fund already up 40% in the last year 🚀🚀

Yeah VT is safer as an etf but bitcoin has that juicy allure of doing a 10x over 10 years which no index fund could ever dream of.

>As US agriculture flails, farmers see big corn acres as best bet to break even - https://www.reuters.com/world/us/us-agriculture-flails-farmers-see-big-corn-acres-best-bet-break-even-2026-02-18/ Despite potential headwinds our fund remains firmly convicted in our original thesis and will continue to buy, dehydrate, and store Physical Corn. No material changes to Physical Corn’s potential as a store of value have occurred, and we anticipate Physical Corn returns to exceed the market over the next 15 years.

well it’s in any fund that tracks the S&P. starting at an insane cost basis

Depending on when I exit this CVNA short… I’m pulling off 100k out of the trading account. 50k to monthly 30 day T Bills for tax savings, 50k to Bogglehead target date retirement index fund account.

Right and what I’m saying is that if the Gov is forced to pay back all that “tax revenue” to companies as a result of this case, it will fuck with the financial system. Even if they don’t have to pay it back, you now have to come up with a new tax source quickly to fund the cuts for the billy’s. Whole thing is dumb as fuck.

\*HEDGE FUND ALPHAQUEST SHUTTERS AFTER THREE-YEAR LOSING STREAK ONE OF US ONE OF US[](https://x.com/zerohedge/status/2024231822448542132)

Three months expenses in a HYSA, 3 more in a money market fund - slightly better yields than a HYSA, a little bit illiquid and not as safe as the HYSA so don't put the full emergency fund into it. If the 50k is already in index funds just add to that with the rest.

We got Saudi Investment fund exiting TTWO position right before GTA 6 before GTA 6.

Can someone smarter than me explain how the market is seemingly content to stay near all-time highs when the economic situation for the average consumer seems (to me at least) to be getting worse? Surely these companies that make up the market need a healthy economy and a healthy consumer with spending power to fund their growth? Am I the one disconnected from reality or is the market disconnected from reality?

Well, at least they still have a college fund.

Panic sold my child’s college fund

Not denominated but actively hedged. Based on what gemini was saying the hedging is basically a contract (inside the fund) to do the currency exchange at an older rate. So if the dollar keeps dipping the hedging should keep being a bonus. Though if the swiss franc drops or the dollar rises it would hurt performance. Over the last 5 years regular dollar spy outperformed the swiss franc spy so it's not fool proof. I guess i won't do it and just stick to gold for hedging or buy swiss francs seperately (in case the next crash destroys everything including currencies like the euro and dollar)

Can Robinhood announce a $1B fund to prop up the share price of HOOD I'm dying over here Vlad send help

You don’t remember when his retarded ass announced that he’s shorting NVDA and everyone jumped off the cliff with him? I was way up on calls and lost my ass for absolutely no reason and then he announced that he’s giving up his hedge fund because he’s too retarded.

The world is ran by pedophiles. We are all wage slaves to fund their silly parties on private islands where they rape children. That is all.

Hedge fund people like it, or did, before the accounting officer was fired

this algo response test proved 3 things: 1. Algos really do just inverse wsb sentiment (I tested it however only on bullish sentiment) 2. Cresco investments ltd. really bet big on inversing wsb. 3. therefore Tomorrow big red day as an hedge fund liquidates its assets en masse.

Robinhood introduces Robinhood Ventures Fund I Yeah a venture into Wendy’s job apps maybe

WTF IS ROBINHOOD VENTURE FUND ONE ??? 1️⃣🤣🤣🤣

Hood just released their own mutual fund and are acting like they reinvented the wheel.

MSFT: That douche fund manager that said 99% of software companies won't survive AI or some bullshit actually bought MSFT calls along after selling everything else.

The Winter Olympics is camp for rich kids. U.S. taxpayers don't fund Olympians, so not a problem. Other countries like Canada do. So when I read stories about how they are running out of condoms at the Olympic village, I am just happy my taxes paid for some rich kids to go to Italy to get laid.

Inverse MSTR fund actually just sitting there doing nothing for so long while MSTR literally 5 ft deep digging its own grave. Load up on leaps, they suppressing the options prices on purpose to try to keep it contained.

Smolik The Hedge Fund is my favorite Neumantendo game

“Fund managers now think companies are overinvesting in AI” But did they see that 10 second video of Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise fighting?

Please be right! I paid for a European 3 month vacay in 2022 out of my hedge fund!

Glad I could fund a hedge fund managers ski trip this February

Fund my winter Ferrari

Why no 3x inverse Epstein fund?  For the impossible situation in which accusations actually affect the share price.

Going to be able to fund my retirement now with all my old sata hard drives, DDR2, and my collection of IDE cables.

The Big Short ruined shorting, and while I miss out on profits selling long too early, I accumulate losses closing shorts. Whenever im short and deep in red, I just think *Im not some douchebag hedge fund with Goldman Sachs like in Big Short*. Then close the short. Three weeks later, those stock is down like $100+/share

Stop buying avocado toast and you can fund your next 0dte faster!! 😭

I'm still doing way better on CS skins than my "house fund" in an HYSA. A hilarious fact. But when Valve suddenly rugged everyone with a trade up contract on gloves and knives I ended up suddenly bagholding some stuff down 50%-60%. Apparently they wiped out a couple billion in market cap of items and overall stuff is down 30% or so. Now people are afraid to buy because who knows what other nonsense they will pull like that again.

Sucks that I can’t fund a Roth IRA anymore. Have to use super mega back door just like my wife’s boyfriend.

Id buy AMZN but i cant really be fucked help fund Bezos' side projects in all honesty, which is basically why its been capped to the upside

To be completely honest, women don’t like frat dudes. The only ones that entertain them is trust fund babies and ones that were sheltered until they became an adult.

Why is it “go fund me” and not “come fund me”

Ambitions? Spill your guts on here dude, I'm sure everyone will have positive contributions and maybe fund you if it maths out

>Recent reports from a number of Wall Street's leading prime brokerages, ​including Goldman Sachs and JPMorgan, and interviews with four hedge fund industry insiders who declined to be named talking about sensitive topics, indicate that demand for North America-focused hedge fund strategies ‌has fallen over the past year, while appetite for other markets has benefitted. >Asia allocations were up 13% on a net basis at the start of this year, compared to 7% last year. Allocations to North America are ​set to rise at a slower rate this year at 7%, compared to an increase of 14% at the start of last year. https://www.reuters.com/legal/transactional/hedge-funds-trim-north-america-exposure-amid-trade-tensions-dollar-pain-megacap-2026-02-02/

What you folks think of Hood’s upcoming venture fund?

You are a hedge fund. You ape calls EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY into Walmart with a 47 PE ratio, which means you are expecting it to grow much faster than Microsoft with a 25 PE ratio. And at the same time, you press FUCKING HARD into shorts FUCKING EVERY SINGLE DAY on Lululemon that has crashed 70% and is priced for bankruptcy even though it is growing double digits internationally. These cucks are a billion times more fucking stupid than your average wsb user