FUND

Bombing Iran? Buy Lockheed, Raytheon, Exxon Mobil, and US Oil Fund.

You guys realize Iran is a religious dictatorship that was trying to build a nuclear bomb? And they fund terrorist organizations with the goal of destroying one of their neighbouring countries? It’s like trying to negotiate a peace treaty with Russia. It’s not going to work.

https://www.solactive.com/index/DE000SL0E2G2/ damn optoelectronics. And of course l&g liquidated the only fund tracking it in march of last year.

That’ll be so fucking hilarious seeing all of those stupid, out of shape incels try to find a job. They really cut cancer research, national park workers and NOAA workers to fund ICE 

If your IQ is under 70 you are supported by the government while the normies pay taxes to fund your survival. Idk man, I think they’ve got this figured out better than we do.

I have been following it waiting on SEC approval, but so many people with “cash” account options like Robinhood. That retail is able to play “freely” kinda, settle fund by next day.

Bought puts for the weekend. Am I a hedge fund manager now?

Which hedge fund is front running amazon. I wanted to dca when my pay comes in dafk.

Starting my own hedge fund called ShrekDick LLC.

Won’t someone think of little Timmy’s college fund

>*CoreWeave cannot fund meaningful Rubin buildout in 2026 from any identified capital source without either another hyperscaler contract to use as SPV collateral — a third Meta-style arrangement — or a dilutive equity raise of significant size. The major cloud providers and companies like Tesla, Meta and OpenAI have all begun or accelerated work on their own AI processors specifically to escape the GPU shortage dynamics CoreWeave depends on.* # OOF

Anyone wanna invest 18 trillion to my AI booze fund

If I get rich off of ACHR I'm going to fund a laboratory to clone Harambe and then buy the zoo where Punch is located, then put them together in an enclosure so they become best buds and once Harambe becomes a silverback reintroduce them to Punch's troop and then will see who's the tough guys

Tomorrow is going to be ugly, huh? Do you think large funds are going to risk holding equities over month end with the very real risk of war over the weekend? The last thing they want to do is wake up Monday to their fund being totally fucked to start March.

If you don’t have at least 650k in a trust fund from your parents while they also pay for your housing you failed as a person

Bulls lost their life savings so Jensen could dump more stock to fund his new mansion 🫵🫵🫵🫵

"Worst hedge fund day of the year." Oh no! anyway...

I wrote this yesterday around 3pm EST: *"NVDA is being fattened up before it gets slaughtered tomorrow."* Hmmm, maybe I should start my own hedge fund.

"Profit taking? You mean hedge funds don't just constantly buy and hold stock for 40 years until the fund retires?"

Thats what happens when 60% of your revenue comes from 4 customers and 60% of its revenue is IOU. Then those 4 customers burn money and keep rasing funding to cover the payment. Now those customers arnt just in debt to Nvidia but also whoever helped fund then. Double collapse

Every institution and hedge fund on earth is shorting this stock

Who cares about their cashflow?? They're going into debt to fund their Capex at this point. Either way NVDA is getting their money one way or another

There's definitely some hedge fund full porting NVDA with leverage right now. You can just see it in real time.

"Dad, do I have a college fund?" You don't need college son, I bought bitcoin back in 2026.

MM's desperately trying to keep HOOD at $75 (again) before the Robinhood Venture Fund IPO next week.

Slowly decoupling from BTC and this will accelerate it: Robinhood Ventures Fund I IPO is next week.

To all the younger homies, please open your 401k TODAY and full port a tech fund with 10% of your pay, none of this “2075 plan” bullshit. You can change that up down the line when you got more money. Sincerely your 29 y/o unc

Because criminals use it, nations under sanctions use it, US gov uses it to bribe and fund opposition in enemy nations, rich tech cucks buy it and now ETFs are financializing it

Just a small contribution, from wonderful donors like you, can make sure a hedge fund manager’s nose remains powdered.

no insider trading except for me and my hedge fund bros

We're one year away from Trump just asking people to deposit their paychecks directly to his family fund for "investing"

It’s fucking regarded Michael Burry was right on his NVDA and PLTR short positions but he paper handed bitch sold and closed his fund, epic shit LMAOOOO

Dumping the rest of my $RDDT to fund my upcoming extended stay at the Self Hating Redditors Rehab Clinic. we know ourselves too well to believe in the stock that has us addicted

Sold stocks to fund my option gambling. Last chance to make back $100k

I’ve come to realize a lot of fund managers are exactly like that meme of Patrick with the stupid machine

Remember in December when Texas approved a bill to start and fund a $5 million "State Bitcoin Reserve"?

🥭 announcing tonight sovereign fund: treasury gonna be buying Tesler, 🌽, all oil companies, WMT, and 8 other stocks

SOTU.... sponsored by Robinhood Ventures Fund I

Tonight: SOTU. Tomorrow: **NVDA** earnings. Thursday:  **HOOD** $1b closed end fund IPO opens for trading. 690+ EOW

He’s stealing the money from the fund.

If Buttcorn is backed by the electricity used to create it, then my burned toast is a sovereign wealth fund.

Maybe the tech bros want a inauguration fund refund

I got some exposure via Fundrise’s innovation fund but they recently closed it pending an IPO

If you are a big hedge fund and you find yourself trapped in a shitty stock position, just have a couple of your connected buddies send tips to Bloomberg and you can have whatever story printed and they can be cited as "Sources familiar with the matter" and voila, instant exit liquidity.

I want to sell everything and move into a global fund. Too much volatility.

Anthropic, OpenAI, xAI are getting cucked by a Chinese hedge fund side project and the Chinese equivelant to DoorDash lmao.

>Wall Street opened the week under heavy pressure as risk sentiment deteriorated on AI-related credit concerns and fresh trade uncertainty amid the feud between President Donald Trump and the Supreme Court. >The blue-chip index was weighed down by sharp losses in financial names. A wave of selling hit asset managers after concerns emerged around a private credit fund managed by Blue Owl Capital Inc. (NYSE:OWL). The firm announced it is liquidating $1.4 billion in assets to raise money to pay out individual investors Apollo Global Management Inc. (NYSE:APO) sank 6.6% on the day, marking its worst session since Liberation Day. Blackstone Inc. (NYSE:BX) slid 6.7% and has now dropped 16% over the past three sessions, its steepest three-day decline since March 2020, touching the lowest level since late 2023. Ares Management Corp. (NYSE:ARES) fell 6.3% KKR & Co. Inc. (NYSE:KKR) tumbled 8.3%, extending its monthly loss to 20%, the worst stretch since 2015. The weakness spilled into established financial heavyweights. American Express (NYSE:AXP) dropped 7.4%, Goldman Sachs Group Inc. (NYSE:GS) lost 3.5% and JPMorgan Chase & Co. (NYSE:JPM) retreated 4.5%. For the broader Financials Select Sector SPDR Fund (NYSE:XLF) it’s the worst day since early April 2025.

The only ones making money are insiders cashing out or companies selling memory to Ai companies. Everyone else is just burning their reserves to fund this magical AI fairy land that will solve world hunger and magically make companies rich without laying off half the country.

Who tf wants to take over Iran? We’re going to fund a never ending war Guh

SPY is a meme stock now. jfc the worlds largest index fund has no stability