ARE

🎶🎵”ALL MY BEARS ARE DEAD, PUSH ME TO THE EDGE.” 😵🙂‍↔️

# THE METARDS ARE READY TO BUY ALL DIPS!!!

BULLISH AS FUCK REST OF THE YEAR NOW THAT DODGERS WON. BEARS ARE BIGLY FUCKED

WE WIN BOTH THE STANLEY CUP AND THE MLB PLAYOFFS CANADA: YOU ARE USELESS

#WE ARE TIED

PUT YOUR HANDS UP Sad-Airman!!! POLICE ARE ENROUTE! PREPARE TO BE BOOKED FOR PROVIDING ILLEGAL FINANCIAL ADVICE! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/wallstreetbets) if you have any questions or concerns.*

*** THIS IS THE RED CROSS, THIS IS THE RED CROSS WE ARE SEARCHING FOR BEAR SURVIVORS. IF YOU NEED HELP, OR KNOW OF SOMEONE WHO NEEDS HELP, PLEASE APPROACH THE MEDICAL STATION.

# Credit Crisis, Record AI Spending, Mass Unemployment, Inflation Exploding AGAIN, Interest won't get cut further....... and you thought I would be smart to buy calls in SPY after a 30% in 6 months ?????? GOSH YOU ARE BEYOND STUPID

MR MM THEY SOLD THEIR GLD NO LONGER ARE THE BAGS OF OLD PUMP THAT SHIT MAKE MY CALLS GO UP TENFOLD

# BAGS ARE SO HEAVY, I MAY HAVE TO DROP THEM. OTHERWISE, NO CHRISTMAS GIFTS THIS YEAR

# WHY ARE WE DROPPING

BULLS ARE COOK

AMZN CALLS ARE SPOOKY 👻

WE ARE GONNA GO PARABOLIC TODAY

Chat GPT is literal Trash GPT, I needed it to delete tasks, it no longer knew where the task ID was located in order to delete it. The AI said I have to contact support and have them find it. I’m over here like “YOU ARE FUCKING AI WHY THE FUCK CANT YOU CONTACT YOUR OWN FUCKING SUPPORT TO FIX THE ISSUE” it literally created more work for me than less. Needless to say, this is when I realized AI is 99% smoke and mirrors. It’s still going to replace a fuck ton of works force and remove jobs that were trivial but I’ll be damned if they start using it for engineering.

#“BEARS ARE VILE CREATURES”- TIM APPLE 2025

WE ARE SO BACK BABY. Spy 7000 no longer a meme

RDDT WTF ARE YOU DOING

#AMZN LAYOFFS ARE BULLISH!!!

I CASHED ON ROKU PUTS AND CASHED ON AMZN. MSTR YOU ARE NEXT

YES MY AMZN CALLS ARE PRINTING!!!!! 💎💎💎

Can't wait for all the "WHERE ARE APPLE EARNINGS!?" comments like every quarter.

#SPY WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ARE YOI DOING. GO UP YOU STUPID GHAY AS POS

GOLD WORTH INFINITE MONEY WE ARE SO FUCKING BACK

GOLD BERS YOU FUCKING RETARDS WE ARE NEVER GOING UNDER 4000 AGAIN SKY IS THE LIMIT BUY BUY BUY

WE ARE SELLING TO WILLING BUYERS AT THE FAIR MARKET PRICE

thought intel was bad? in 4 months, some of the S&P 500 stocks price dropped to 1998 prices ARE BAX FMC

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READ A LOT OF NEWS TODAY DID NOT READ 155% CHINA TARIFFS ARE CANCELLED

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BAGS ARE HEAVY

“That’s it! I’ve had it with this dump. We got no food! We got no jobs…OUR PETS HEADS ARE FALLING OFF!!!” It was at this time that Lloyd Christmas became a bull.

SOYBEANS ARE BACK!

BEARS GET THE FUCK TO BED HE JUST SAID THE MEETING WAS A 12 out of 10. I REPEAT WE ARE AT CODE 12

THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT CHIPS I REAPEAT THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT CHIPS

##JPOW GAVE YOU A CLEAR BUY SIGNAL SAYING WE ARE NOT IN A BUBBLE ^(and dumb ass bears bought puts LMAO)

OH MY GOD!!! IT'S OVER!!! SELL EVERYTHING AT OPEN!! WE ARE CRASHING!!! BERS WON!!! BOOLS LOST!!!

Holy shit, youtube ad where the AI lady is talking about having sex with her stepson WE ARE SO FUCKING COOKED IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY ANYMORE

AMY YOU ARE NOT PUMPING THE STOCK WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR MALFUNCTION

🥭: GREAT MEETING WITH XI. BIG BEAUTIFUL TRADE DEAL COMING! CHINA WILL BUY OUR CHIPS AND WE ARE OPEN TO DISCUSSING SALSA COMING SOON

Nothing burger earnings, PUTS AND CALLS ARE FUK, WSB IS FUK, LMAOOOO

>🥭: I AM HAPPY TO ANNOUNCE WE ARE TRADING 'TOO LATE' POWELL AND HIS MONEYPRINTER TO CHINA IN RETURN FOR SOYBEAN PURCHASES

WHY ARE U SELLING

"YOU PORS ARE ON YOUR OWN" ~ Jpow Oct 2025

THE QUESTIONS ARE LONGER THAN THE ACTUAL PRESS CONFERENCE WTF 🤌🤌

WE ARE DRIVING IN FOG

JUST RENAME S&P 500 to S&P 10 SINCE THE 490 OTHER STOCKS ARE GOING TO BE BLOOD RED ANYWAY

AWS AND AZURE ARE DOWN. Bring down this house of cards

MY TIMBERS ARE SHIVERING!!!!!!

>JPOW: AFTER A SURPRISE DISCUSSION WITH MASKED MEMBERS OF THE PRESIDENTS TEAM I WOULD LIKE TO RETRACT MY PREVIOUS STATEMENTS REGARDING THE VALUATIONS OF ASSETS AND EQUITIES. IF ANYTHING, THEY ARE EXTREMELY UNDERVALUED AND YOU SHOULD BUY THEM IMMEDIATELY